Jag Lag

Jag Lag wrote in 'concrete sentences' to ensure that first time car insurers would give him a discount. He was a brickie on a building site and concrete was his play-dough. He was sentenced to life at birth and had mapped out his journey on Google Streetview, using the app on his Jag-phone. He'd never been one of the 'Flat tire brigade' and knew from experience that tires were round. This always helped on a long journey. Jag Lag built a wall around himself and could never receive letters as he didn't leave room for a letter box but none-the-less he communicated with the world through social media. How on earth he managed to get out and drive his Jag is something the author of this story couldn't work out and chose to ignore! Jag had his secret methods though and he wasn't letting on, even to his own author! Jag hadn't spoken to his author for a long while because he was too busy building walls without doors and writing Concrete Poems on them to relieve his boredom of being trapped in his own creations. Jag's supervisor only kept him on because he could sneak a ride in Jag's Jag while Jag was snug in his brick prison and not able to object. Jag always constructed his sentences out of concrete and knew you couldn't build a house out of abstract clauses. One day the insurers came to visit Jag as their alogarithms had been impressed by his concrete-ism. Jag soon had them bricked up in one of his concrete sentences and they had to stay there until the sentence was over. Luckily Jag was far away when the sentence was over, driving over hill and dale at a discount price. To learn more about Jag and his use of Social Media, please apply here. There may be a lag before we reply!

Words by Trev Teasdel

Inspired by this article https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2016/nov/02/admiral-to-price-car-insurance-based-on-facebook-posts